Here is a story on how not to buy cats.

First of all, do not buy cats (kittens but they will be cats soon enough) that are free. Oh, it seems like a good deal but free is only an illusion. Grey kitty (no names yet) was a "free" cat. Andi really wanted a cat, not so much a kitten but more so a cat that lays around the house instead of tearing up the house. So she got a "free" kitten that she found advertised in the paper. Without so much as shutting off the engine, she dropped the kitten off at the house and proceeded to go out and buy $150 worth of kitten supplies. You know, a litter box, a scratching post/cat pedestal, kitty litter, kitty food, kitty litter liners, and a collar with a bell so we can hear him moving around. "Free" cat aka "grey kitty" has now ran up a bill of $150.

So Andi calls me upstairs to help pick out a name for grey kitty as she is googling kitty names on her computer. A half an hour or so later I go downstairs to see the kitchen door wide open to the garage, the garage door open and no grey kitty to be seen. Kelby has never seen a door that looks better closed than open. A mad dash around the house nets nothing. Searching more carefully still comes up short. We send our 8 year old and 5 year old around both blocks on bikes to search as it is now about a half hour from darkness as we more carefully search the house. I take Coco, our lab, through the house thinking she will sniff him out. Nothing on both accounts. I go around the block and ask a neighbor on the other side if she has seen a grey kitty. "You are the third person to ask" I'm told, so the kids are doing their job. Desperation sets in as it begins to get dark, a kitty that has only been in our house about two hours total and is six weeks old has gone AWL. Soon it is dark, time for bed for the kids and no grey kitty. The kids go to bed crying and praying for the grey kitty. I'm thinking I hope it never has to catch his own food with that bell around his neck. Good luck sneaking up on prey with that.

Andi then makes a decision. She decides that she is going to have a kitten regardless, and that another kitten will make the kids (and herself) feel better about loosing the first one. I warn her that it may be prudent to wait over night to see if grey kitty comes back, but I'm out voted 1 to 1. She brings back a nice 7 week old black kitty from the pet store, currently named "black kitty", that cost $40. $40 nets a kitty that has his first vaccinations. But a half hour later she says that getting black kitty really didn't make her feel better like she thought it would. She goes to bed, and I'm up working on the computer with new replacement kitty in the office. I hear a bell jingle behind us, and out from under a printer stand comes grey kitty stretching his legs like he just took the best cap nap ever.

Running total... 2 cats... $190. Vet day to get a checkup on grey kitty. Grey kitty has ear mites, gave them to black kitty and now we have to also treat the dog. A check for some feline virus, worming and vaccinations results in a $270 vet bill. "Free" kitty(s) now have ran up a bill of $460. We still have vaccinations for black kitty, and then another $360 for neutering and declawing which should get us close to a thousand bucks by the time we are done, all for a "free kitty". So the kids are happy, Andi is happy and I'm a bit stunned. To top it off, one of them pooped in my Chicago Bears cap. If I can figure out which one it was, I may send a bill.

Kyler decided to sell Slushies near the street after he defied orders and bought a Sponge Bob slushie maker at a garage sale down the street. He snuck out of the house with his piggy bank after they had already bought army men. I should have confiscated it at that point, but I'm a softie.

Besides, selling slushies was a good idea and I didn't want to squash my budding entrepreneur. I think the bee's were the kids biggest customers and in about five minutes they had two trapped under glasses. Seeing furious bees in clear glasses trying to get out probably didn't help sales. I bought the first slushie, then I sent Kelby out with a quarter to buy the second one. I think we were his only customers. Then Kiefer came in so I offered a quarter to him to go buy a slushie. After all, we can' t have a five year old's first business crash and burn in two hours, can we? Kiefer says, "I already bought one." I said, "So you took a quarter and gave it to Kyler on your own?" thinking, wow, he is finally being unselfish and trying to help his brother out by giving up a quarter of his own. Kiefer says "yes Dad." So I tell him he did a good thing and he should be proud. "Thanks Dad" Kiefer says as he is running out the door. Just before the door slams I hear "Oh, I got the quarter from your truck!"